Deja Read online

  Déjà

  Tajana Sutton

  Déjà.

  Copyright © 2010 by Tajana Sutton

  Al rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form without written permission from the publisher.

  For more information, write to:

  Ruby Love Publications

  PO Box 1092

  Scherervil e, IN 46375

  ISBN: 978-1-61364-574-1

  Printed in the USA

  ACKNOWLEDGMENT:

  First and foremost, I have to give glory to God. I’ve learned that through him anything is possible. For so long I wanted to be an Urban Literature Author but I didn’t have the courage or pride to see it through. I prayed about it and this is where he led me. I am truly blessed.

  To my children Camryn, Victoria, and Kobey, you are my inspiration. You guys keep me on my toes but I love you very much! To my husband and best friend Toby Lyons, thank you for sticking by my side through the good and the bad. Life has thrown several curvebal s at our relationship but here we are stil standing tal . I love you very much!

  To my mom Victoria Bizzle-McCul ough, you are a trooper. I thank you for always being a great mom and supporting me in any decisions that I’ve made good or bad.

  For being one of my best friends but also not letting me forget you’re stil the mother, I love you! To my father Leroy Sutton, thank you for giving me life, I love you! To my stepfather Ronald McCul ough, thank you for your love and support over the years, love you! To my brother Leroy Sutton Jr., I hope that you learn from your mistakes and put God first in your life he shal see you through, I love you! To my entire family I love you al and I thank you for always supporting me.

  A special thanks to my publishing company Enaz Publications. Thank you for believing in my work and taking a chance on me. To my distribution company www.blackbooksplus.com Thank you for al your hard work.

  To al my readers thank you for al your love and support. Without you, none of this wil be possible. I love you al from the bottom of my heart!

  A special thanks to my girl Ms. Lisa Perry. You held me down while my book was stil in the works and I love and respect you for that!

  For those that I failed to mention, please know that this is just the beginning. If I didn’t get you in this one, I wil definitely get you in the next one.

  Love always,

  Tajana S.

  ~ONE~

  “Mom whose car is that next to Dad's?” asked Déjà as Charlotte pul ed into the driveway. Her body jerked forward as Charlotte brought the car to a screeching halt.

  When she looked up at her mother, tears were running down her face as she clenched the steering wheel tightly.

  Charlotte only knew of one person that owned an Audi S8.

  “Mommy, why are you crying?” Charlotte remained silent. She reached into her purse and handed Déjà her cel phone.

  “Cal 9-1-1.”

  “Why, is daddy okay?” Déjà questioned with concern.

  “Just do what you’re told,” Charlotte snapped as she hustled from the car and disappeared inside the house.

  Déjà did as she was told. But she wanted to see her daddy.

  She got out of the car and went into the house.

  “9-1-1, what’s your emergency?” The female dispatcher asked.

  “Um, hi...my name is Déjà Morgan and my mom told me to dial 9-1-1, but I don't know why.”

  “Is anyone hurt?”

  Just as Déjà was about to answer, she was startled by gunshots coming from the upstairs.

  “Were those gunshots?” The dispatcher asked.

  “Yes, and they came from my mommy and daddy’s room,” Déjà answered as she began to cry into the phone while tiptoeing up the stairs towards her parent’s bedroom.

  “Where are you now, honey?”

  “Outside my mommy and daddy’s room,” Déjà answered.

  “Do not go in. I'm sending help just stay with me.” Déjà shrieked when she heard another gunshot from the master bedroom. “Help is on the way,” the dispatcher assured her. The house was quiet except for Déjà’s intense breathing and whimpering. Déjà heard sirens and saw red and blue flashing lights through the big picture window in the loft area where she sat in a fetal position.

  “They’re here,” Déjà said into the phone.

  “Okay, stay on the phone until the officers enters the home and gets to you,” the dispatcher instructed.

  The officers came bursting through the door. Some came upstairs where she sat shaking and crying hysterical y in a corner. Others were searching the downstairs area and some were checking the outside premises. “Clear. Clear. Clear.” Anonymous voices came blaring through the walkie talkie.

  “Up here!” shouted a female officer.

  She spotted Déjà in a corner across from her parent’s bedroom. “Is there anyone else in the house?” questioned the officer.

  “My mom and dad are here; I think they’re in there,” she said, pointing to the master bedroom. A guy in a gray suit and a policeman in uniform stood on the side of the door to the master bedroom with their guns drawn. The policeman slowly turned the knob and pushed open the door.

  “Mommy!”

  Déjà

  screamed

  when

  she

  saw

  Charlotte’s body slumped over a chair with a gun in her left hand.

  “Get her out of here!” The guy in the gray suit yel ed.

  “No! I want my mommy!” Déjà screamed. As the female officer carried her away, Déjà caught a glimpse of her father James and a woman she had seen plentiful times at his office in the bed. The white sheets were covered in blood.

  ~TWO~

  Déjà was sent to live with her Grandmother Margaret. Margaret was extremely hard on Déjà. She blamed her for what happened that night. She would repeatedly say “if you were never born, Charlotte would have left that bastard a long time ago.” Déjà despised living there. Margaret often stayed out al night, leaving Déjà in the house by herself. Déjà had become close with her Aunt Gail who loved kids, but were unable to have children of her own. She didn’t like how her mother was treating Déjà but Margaret wouldn’t let Gail take custody of her because she didn’t want to lose the monthly check she was getting from the government after being awarded custody by the state.

  When Déjà turned fourteen, she was placed in foster care. DCFS came and removed her from Margaret’s home, stating that they had received an anonymous tip that she was being abused.

  “I’ve never laid a finger on Déjà, you bastards!” yel ed Margaret as child protective services escorted Déjà to the car.

  “Do you have any other family members that you think we should contact?” the woman asked Déjà on the way to the foster home.

  “I don’t know a lot of my family, but you can try my Auntie Gail,” said Déjà. Gail was ecstatic to take custody of her. She loved Déjà as if she birthed her.

  Margaret was furious when she found out Gail had custody of Déjà. She approached her at her house.

  “You’re probably the one that cal ed and said I was abusing her!” She spat while standing in Gail’s living room.

  “No I didn’t, but I should’ve because Lord knows you were.”

  “I’ve never laid hands on that child, so what would make you think I abused her?”

  “You’re not supposed to leave no fourteen year old girl in the house by herself for weeks at a time!” Gail shouted.

  “She would have to cal me to come over to feed her; I’d end up staying over there until you came back from wherever it was you were.”

  “When I was fourteen I stayed in the house by myself,” said Margaret.

  “Yeah, but I bet it wasn’t for weeks at a time with no damn food!” Gail rep
lied with anger.

  “You had absolutely nothing in the house for the poor child to eat, not unless she liked eating baking soda. Just admit it, you blame her for what happened to Charlotte and that’s not fair to her. Hel , she didn’t ask to come into this world. Maybe if you would have stayed in the house with your kids instead of on that damn boat and running the street, you would’ve known your daughter was sleeping with the son of a pimp before she got pregnant.” Margaret just stood there and stared at Gail. She couldn’t respond because she knew that Gail was speaking the truth. Margaret had a gambling habit. She spent more time on the casino boats than at home raising her children.

  Margaret took a seat on the couch with tears in her eyes. She didn’t want to accept the fact that her youngest daughter had kil ed herself over a man. Margaret felt as if she had failed her as a mother.

  “I should have been home with you girls teaching y’al the fundamentals of being strong women and not settling for less,” Margaret said crying hysterical y. “My baby kil ed herself because I failed to teach her self-respect. I’m so sorry baby!” she cried out.

  “It’s okay mom. You made mistakes when we were children, but now is the time to fix it. You have a granddaughter that needs her family right now, so now is the time to make it up to Charlotte,” Gail said, calming her mother.

  “You’re right baby!” said Margaret.

  “Déjà wil continue to stay here with me, but you need to be active in her life. She has suffered enough,” she stated. She hugged and comforted her mother.

  Margaret kept her word and helped Gail raise Déjà until she went off to col ege.

  ~THREE~

  At age 18, Déjà enrol ed in one of the top col eges in Il inois, majoring in Psychology, but she didn’t move on campus until her sophomore year. Déjà stood five foot nine with long toned legs, long black hair and the most beautiful almond shaped eyes. She caught the attention of most of the men on campus, but Déjà only had eyes for one particular guy, Shawn Nelson.

  He was a tal , caramel toned brother with a bald head. People often compared him to Teri’s boyfriend from the Soul Food series. He didn’t go to school there, but she’d seen him around quite often. She’d also seen him around her house, but she’d never spoken to him.

  Girls would literal y fight over him. He fine, but no man is worth fighting over, Déjà would say to herself. She knew he was a street dude and that’s what turned her on the most. “I’m going to make him my first,” Déjà said to her best friend Jade.

  *******

  Jade was Déjà’s roommate and sorority sister in col ege. They had so much in common. They both had gone through something traumatic in their childhood. For that reason, they understood one another. Jade Rivera was born and raised in Chicago, Il inois. She was the only child of Kate and Reginald Rivera. Reginald was Puerto Rican and Kate was African American.

  Jade was yel ow skinned, average height, with jet black wavy hair that flowed down her back. She had the most beautiful light brown eyes. Men drooled over her beautiful smile and the one dimple on her right cheek.

  Reginald had been convicted of conspiracy to commit murder when Jade was 9-years-old. Kate worked two jobs to make sure Jade never went without electricity, heat, or food on the table. Kate never al owed Jade to see her father in prison, in which he agreed. He was sentenced to fifteen years without the possibility of parole. Kate’s main objective was to protect Jade from any harm that could possibly come her way. She was one of those parents that always thought of what if. She never lived on the first floor of any apartment building, whereas someone could climb through Jade’s window at night; she never al owed men that she dated to come to her home, or meet Jade. No other family members were permitted to look after her other than her mother Cathy. Kate worked as a secretary during the day and at Circuit City in the evening. Jade stayed at her grandmother Cathy’s house each day after school until her mother picked her up at night.

  One afternoon when Jade was 13 years old. She was at her Grandmother’s house waiting for her mother to get off work. She sat at the kitchen table working on her homework. Cathy was baking a cake. “Oh shucks, I’m out of eggs,” Cathy said, looking into the fridge. “I’m going to run up to the grocery store and grab some eggs. Finish your homework and do not open the door for absolutely no one. Your uncle Paul is down in the basement sleeping,” she said while putting on her coat.

  “Okay, Grandma,” Jade said, handing Cathy her scarf. Cathy walked out the door, locking it behind her.

  Jade went back and sat at the kitchen table to finish up her homework like she’d been told.

  Paul came upstairs from the basement just as Jade was opening her math book.

  “Where did mama go?” He asked, getting a glass out the cabinet.

  “She went up the block to the grocery store to get some eggs,” Jade said while pul ing out a sheet a paper.

  Jade didn’t like her Uncle Paul. She felt that he often looked at her in a weird way.

  “Why do you have on those tight ass jeans, you’re only thirteen?” He said as he brushed passed her. He sat down at the table across from Jade.

  “My mommy let me wear them so why do you care what I have on?” She asked with attitude.

  “You know you have a smart ass mouth for a little girl.”

  “Whatever!” she said. She got up from the table and walked off. She hated the sight of Paul. He was a drunk that forever reeked of alcohol.

  “You’re not going to keep getting smart with me you little wench!” he said, getting up and going after her.

  “Leave me alone!” She said, leaving the kitchen.

  She went into the living room, sat on the sofa, and picked up the remote off the coffee table.

  “Leave you alone? You’re in my house, and you’re tel ing me to leave you alone?” He was now standing over Jade.

  “Move from in front of the TV. And, for the record, this isn’t your house. This is Grandma Cathy’s house.

  You’re just a drunk that live in her basement!” she replied with attitude. Jade scooted to the other side of the couch so she could see the television.

  “You must think you’re grown little girl?” He said, snatching the remote out of her hand, and pinning her down on the couch.

  “Get off of me Uncle Paul,” Jade yel ed while trying to fight him off.

  “I’m going to show you grown,” he threatened. He began kissing her neck while holding her wrists above her head.

  “Get off me, please get off of me!” She screamed and cried out. Kate had just pul ed into the drive-way and was walking up the walkway when she heard her daughter screaming. She snatched up the welcome mat, retrieving the spare key. She heard more screaming as she unlocked the door. She busts in only to see her oldest brother on top of her daughter. She snapped.

  “You motherfucker!” She yel ed, charging at him.

  Kate picked up the vase that was on the end table closest to the door and smashed it over his head. Paul blacked out stil on top of Jade. Kate rol ed him onto the floor and looked over Jade.

  “Did…He?” Kate panted. She tried asking, but couldn’t get the words out as she yanked her daughter up, hugging her tightly.

  “No, mommy he didn’t.” Kate was relieved.

  Cathy came walking through the door. “Why is my damn door opened? Heat is not free!” She spat. She closed the door, sat the eggs down on the table, and then removed her coat. She looked at Kate, then at Jade, and then over on the floor at Paul.

  “What the hel happened in here?” She said, walking over to Paul which was stil knocked out cold on the floor.

  She glanced at the broken glass on the floor and on the couch. “Who broke my damn vase?”

  Paul was now trying to get up off the floor. He sat on the couch with blood pouring down the back of his head onto his shirt. “I walked in on this motherfucker on top my fucking daughter!” Kate yel ed, charging at him once again.

  Cathy caught Kate. She looked over at Jade who
was bal ed up on the floor stil crying. Her hair was al wild.

  “You did WHAT?” She shouted. “You raped that baby?” She screamed.

  “I didn’t rape nobody,” he said.

  “That’s because I caught you before you could, you sick motherfucker!” Kate yel ed, throwing a phone book at him.

  “You have lost your damn mind! You are her damn uncle,” Cathy yel ed at him.

  “Fuck y’al ,” Paul yel ed while getting up, and walking toward the front door, but found himself on the floor once again. He had been hit in the head with the other vase that once sat in the middle of the cocktail table. This time Cathy had thrown it. Paul hasn’t been seen since. Cathy said he was on drugs, but he’s now in a rehabilitation center. When Reginald heard about the incident, he made a mental note that once he got out he was going to kil Paul.

  ~FOUR~

  Déjà was sitting on her front porch studying and enjoying the summer breeze, when a maroon colored Rivera with extremely dark tint pul ed up in front of her house.

  “What up Déjà?” Shawn asked, stepping out the car and walking up the walkway.

  “Nothing much, what’s going on?” she asked, blushing.

  “Shit, what are you doing?” he asked, taking a seat on the top stair.

  “Studying, I have an exam on Monday.”

  “Yeah, wel I won’t disturb you. We can talk later,” he said, pul ing out his cel phone. “Let me get your number and I’l hit you up a little later.” They exchanged numbers. “I’l cal you in a little bit,” he said, getting up and heading back toward his car. Shawn blew the horn as he pul ed off playing the 12 play album. He cal ed her later that night. After talking on the phone for what seemed like forever, Déjà agreed to go for a ride with him.

  He picked her up the fol owing evening around nine.

  “Don’t get scared I won’t take you out of the area,” he said jokingly.

  “Yeah, I don’t know you like that. You might be a serial kil er,” she replied with a smile.

  They rode around for about an hour. In that hour, Déjà had learned that Shawn was twenty three years old, had four siblings, and a four year old daughter. He seemed like a very nice guy. She spent a lot of time with him, but after about a year things began to take a turn for the worse.